Have a little faith β€οΈπŸšπŸ’‹

Evening all ❀️

As I sit In my garden listening to a song is that all right by lady gaga from the motion picture a star is born.

In peace and quite watching the sunset with the smell of beachy air around me I’ve come to a realisation I should be so bloody proud of myself I could actually cry you don’t know how far you have come in life untill you realise your past really doenst define you as a person anymore.

I’m actually where I’m meant to be right here right now present and maybe not always correct but everything I’ve achieved I’ve done from strength and sometimes I don’t know where I pull it all from but every time I get knocked back I keep going.

It’s so easy to compare yourself to others but as humans we are capable of hiding the truth our struggles we have to be strong to put on a brave face.

But every now and again our Brain just clicks and says yeah you know something your alright you.

I don’t want a medal or any sympathy from my blog I just want to share my life experience with people.

But over the past 11 years I’ve had two babies moved 4 times left my family and freinds behind to provide a better life for my girls by the sea had failed relationships and freindship I’ve been hurt countless times battled with illness and my weight and also my confidence is shot to shit but I’m working on that.

I believe fate never gives us anything we can’t handle strength comes from the darkest places.

So now I’m finding out who I am.

And I’m starting to respect myself again.

Maybe it’s time to let the old ways die…

Love to you all where ever you are

Stacie πŸ’‹πŸš xxxx

When life really gives you lemons you really must make lemonade β™₯️

Hey everyone I have been really quite the past week I’ve been working and the heat almost killed me off.

Us brits can’t deal with weather if its to hot we moan if its to cold we moan so mother nature can’t win.

It’s the weekend and it’s absolutely pissing it down typical I planned a few things with the girls but unfortunately the weather has other ideas…

Never mind I only have one week left at work untill I have ten days off work whooop can’t wait.

So I have to say I’m in a pretty good place at the moment I’m really starting to sort my life out.

My health has improved slightly I’ve tried my hardest to stay within my gluten free diet but at times I’ve slipped.

Not a major issue though as I know it takes time to adjust.

At the moment I’m just doing my own thing working on myself to become a better person I suppose that when you come from a dark place you have to rebuild yourself and you may not fit back perfectly as you once was but all the best people are flawed.

I’m not focusing on a situation now I’m just letting it be if people want me they know how to reach me if not then I’m cool with that sometimes we outgrow people it’s life.

I have to say after coming from a dark place you see the world differently you notice all the little things that you once was to busy to notice.

And that it doesn’t matter if things aren’t perfect because nothing very rarely is mistakes are made by everyone but what the difference is if we openly admit and try and rebuild rather than run away and hide.

My main issue I’ve had to deal with is learning to πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡

You have to try for your own peace of mind nothing hurts us more than not knowing well I used to think that but what is always meant for us always radiates back to us.

So what’s meant to be is what’s meant to be what isn’t let that shit go even if it breaks your heart.

Mean while I’m focusing on myself my girls work and my business not only do I focus seashells and lipgloss blog but I now have a new business venture to focus on.

Please say hello to Street Geek custom attire..

This has been a dream of mine for a while I’ve just never tried to forfil it.

Why did I deicide to go into custom designing whilst I’m so busy with life in general well here’s why everyone needs an escape from daily life and we all have a create flair in us all you just have to find your style along side singing and music I am very creative and I needed an outlet to focus on.

So this is why I’m going forward with my idea.

Myself I love band clothing and printed clothing but when you buy from high street stores they are made in there millions so. Chances are you will see a lot of people wearing the same tshirt.

I love individuality I like having things others haven’t but with everything being so mass made now its hard to make yourself stand out.

So this is my vision making custom made clothing this includes tshirts vests hoodies jackets for the moment that are made for the music mad TV series watching movie fanatic geeks everywhere.

I am very excited to share this with you and I hope you wish me success.

So street geek is my new baby so now I need to mould it into my vision and let my creative side show.

I will let you all know when it’s all in motion…

Have a good weekend all hope the weather is better than Merseyside at the moment.

Love to you all

Stacie xxxx

I guess that’s why they call it the blues πŸ™„πŸ™„

Evening all I really hope you have had a good weekend.

I’ve had very mixed emotions anxiety peaked again think it’s the bulid up of my daughter leaving school and few other issues from last week just got a little bit to much for me.

I seem to have calmed down alot now but my stomach is still in knots.

I have to apologies for my post I had taken down I was in a very dark place on Saturday emotions where still high.

Hadn’t slept much hadn’t eaten properly felt slightly dehydrated just found it hard to find the energy to move off the sofa.

As I lay there I just had this surge of anger come over me at this point I was so sick and tired of letting people get me down and me feeling like crap for no reason.

So I thought no more I’ve had enough got up cleaned my whole house top to bottom not only was I knackered afterwards but I felt proud of myself after feeling so shitty I got up stopped feeling sorry for myself and did something productive.

Sometimes you do your own head in with the way you are in life.

This is a big thing for me to admit but I’ve let myself go the past few months not given a shit about what I’ve eaten not been taking care of myself mentally and physically.

Time to make a change I’ve pushed so many genuine people away just because of my own insecurities.

I’ve Gotten to a point In your life where your getting on your own tits and it needs to stop.

My main issue for me is my sleep routine it’s rubbish I can sleep all day but when night comes I’m rubbish.

I’ve tried lots of sleep products and medications none seem to work I’ve tried sleepy creme from lush again did not do a thing for me.

Until I found this πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡…

Avons very own sleep serenity I absolutely love it helps me drift of to sleep easily just spray a bit on your bedding before bed it’s as easy as that.

Retails in at about Β£3.99 bottle can be ordered from your local Avon rep or online.

I really hope this week I can sort myself and my life out better I’m long overdue some positive behaviour.

Love

Stacie xx β€οΈπŸ’•

A mother’s love πŸ‘©β€πŸ‘§β€πŸ‘§

Morning all

Today will be my eldest last day at primary school and the last few weeks I’ve been busy with trips highschool visits leavers prom and today will be her leaving assembly.

I can’t explain the feeling you get when you realise your first born is no longer a baby anymore.. She’s growing up like they all do but sometimes I’m so busy wrapped up in day to day life I don’t stop often enough to reflect on how far she’s come.

Its not been easy for her growing up I’ve moved about a few times so she’s been to different schools but she finally settled in at her current school she’s done amazing I’m so proud of her.

Being a mum and a dad was also tough but I’ve got through it.

Both my girls are so much like me I’m not good with the whole socialising thing neither are they but they have a few close friends.

In my opinion that’s all you need..

Being a mum is by far the hardest job ever to do add work and love life into the mix makes it all very complicated.

My girls come first they need me the most.

I’m happy I’ve got them even though at times it’s hard I cherish every moment they are with me.

Unfortunately I’m unable to have anymore children.

But I’m glad I’ve got my girls and I’m happy I have them with me I’m not big on emotions they know that but what matters the most is that they are mine I’m so proud of them in every way possible.

So today I will be a blubbering mess and a nervous wreck all six weeks holiday until she’s settled in highschool and my youngest is settled into year 2 and adapting to school life without her big sister in primary school with her.

I wish all the year 6s a great last day at school and a happy transition Into highschool.

For all the mums and dad’s out there you should be proud you have done a great job… ❀️

Love to you all

From a very emotional mum

Stacie xx

The late late night playlist πŸŒƒβ˜€οΈπŸŽ€πŸŽ΅πŸŽΈ

Evening all late night post again do I ever get early night nope…

I’m blogging and listening to my late night playlist this is the time of the day I always go back to a time I felt completely at peace with everything my last thoughts before sleep always take me back to the same situation.

This time of my life I would like to keep to myself it’s very special to me and my hopes that my future would turn out just as I was dreaming about but sometimes you can’t have what you truly desire.

Along with my mood I have a few songs I like to listen to each one has a greater meaning to me.

  1. All my life the beatles
  2. Jealous guy John lennon
  3. Dakota stereophonics
  4. Our song matchbox 20
  5. Purple rain Prince
  6. She’s broken Billie eilish
  7. Hold me while you wait Lewis capaldi
  8. Now your gone Tom walker
  9. Ide rather go blind etta James
  10. Can I be him James Arthur
  11. Lost without you Freya ridings
  12. If it makes you happy sheryl crow
  13. Nothing left for you Sam Smith
  14. Turning tables Adele
  15. Overjoyed matchbox 20

Happ listening

Night night

Love 😍

Stacie xx

Leaving the door on the latch

Evening all another late one for me don’t you just think the weekend just goes so fast.

Been a strange few days again… I’ve not done much this weekend other than boxset and trying to sort my home out having a good sort out does you good.

Helps clear the space around you and helps to clear the mind.

Tonight I’ve decided to blog about the old saying leaving the door on the latch to me this means that the door of life is neither open or fully closed at any given time your path can change and situations can turn.

I’m a big believer of cosmic order I don’t follow religion at all I don’t understand it all and to be honest my life’s complex enough without all that.

When people say a door closes but another opens I do belive in this I do think you have to clear your old path in order for a new one to begin.

You know how it goes you become good friends with someone or you have the most amazing relationship with someone then all of a sudden things go wrong.

The pain and the hurt this causes you makes you want to run away and shut that door of the past and nail it shut once your done your done no going back.

Over time you move on and you have no desire whatsoever to open that part of your past again.

But what if you leave that door not completely open or not nailed shut but you’ve left it on the latch with potential for it to be opened again by the hand that you desire.

And Yes I know it’s a lot of doors….

But…

I believe we all make many mistakes and we misjudge people for whats been said at the heat of the moment if that person truly meant something to you, You wouldn’t be so quick to close the door and move on.

This is why sometimes you have to do what you have to do as a human being its about survival.

Even if its taking time away from people and not doing your own head in by trying to over analyse the situation.

If that person really wants to be apart of your life they will be might not be here and now but you always left the door on the latch for them to come back if they wanted to.

I fully understand that some people can’t forgive and forget so easily depends on who the person is and what their personalty is like.

Some of us may not want them back in our lives but choose that decision wisely.

The universe will always pull together what’s meant to be together and pull apart what’s not.

Twin flame connections don’t always come smoothly infact they are pretty much hard work to make work neither party can understand or begin to work out why they connect in this way.

People see twin flames as perfect for each other or everything is seen through rose tinted glasses it’s quite the opposite.

They actually clash more than anyone else they have ever connected with because they are so alike and so unquie together.

Just both too stubborn to see this clearly.

My point here is if you don’t want to close that dam door for good but don’t want to leave it fully open and exposed to the world leave it on the latch see what happens but remember dont be on the other side of it waiting for it to open life still goes on.

Peace out

Stacie xxxxπŸ’‹πŸšβ€οΈπŸ’œ

Be unusual be you… πŸŒˆ

Evening all I trust you are well..
I’m so happy for it to be the weekend πŸ‘Œ peace at last.
So as I’ve mentioned that I’ve been in the spiral of life trying to find myself again find my identity I’m not one to blend into the crowd I’m the girl who got married in converse and who always feels more confident in my festival grunge clothing don’t get me wrong I’ve been told many times I should tone down my look I’m a mum now but truth is my kids think I’m kinda cool.
My most important lesson I’m learning them is not to just fit in with the the flock like little sheep if we was all meant to look the same we might aswell of been like robots coming of a production line.

Perfect there isn’t no such thing the most beautiful women in the universe still has hangups about herself and If they are honest they would tell you that’s the truth.

So tonight I decided to apply this amazing little vegan hair colour to my hair…

(La Riche directions semi permanent hair color in plum…)

P. S sorry pots an bit messy must be used with gloves 🧀

At the moment it was boring dark brown /deep purple colour with grey highlights I know sounds like a weird combination but it actually did work for a while untill I got bored.

Here is a bit about the product πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡

La RichΓ© Ltd have been established since 1981 -they launched the first ever Directions Hair Colour in the UK.
With no ammonia, peroxide or PPD and a strict in house ‘no animal testing’ policy – Directions Semi Permanent Hair Colour is not only the best fashion shade of choice, it’s also the safer way to colour.

I’ve tried many semi permanent hair colours in the past I have found that directions works well on both pre lightened hair and natural hair.

If you would like a more bold and bright colour use on pre lightened hair this amazing colour will always leave your hair feeling fab after bleaching.

If you require a more subtle look then use on unbleached hair I must add that this is a semi permanent colour and it washes Out.
It also comes in a full range of colours including pastel shades.

It’s by far the best product on the market for people who like to. Stand out in a crowd.

Here are a few pictures of my past hair colours…

I’m so lucky I can pull of any hair colour Ive always been told by my friends I will suit any style colour etc but as long as its long and in. Good condition I’m happy but I do love to look different.

P. S I’m so happy my eyebrows have matured over the years πŸ˜‚.

So if you fancy not following sheep why not give a shit and let your inner soul show on the outside.

Go take a look at la Richie directions website and create your own style ❀️.

Link below πŸ‘‡ πŸ‘‡ πŸ‘‡

redirect to la Richie directions website

Love to you all

Stacie xx

β€οΈπŸ’œπŸ’‹πŸ’‹πŸŒˆ

Negative nelly πŸ’“

Afternoon all I know it’s unusual for me to blog in a afternoon on a weekday but I’ve just finished work and I decided to blog about people and their negative attitude and how it can affect people.

In no way is this work related I quite enjoy working with some of my work colleagues /freinds.

Noticed I said some πŸ˜‚.

But no this is just people in general.

So I have this theory that some people just suck all the good energy from you just from being in the same room I call these negativity vampires.

We all know people that moan and who are always complaining about the smallest thing they are never happy and are always jealous of what people have or work hard for you know the ones that nothing positive ever comes out of their mouths well these are negative people and do you need them in your life no way…

You could be having a great day postive outcomes and so one comes out the blue and shits all over your parade its bloody terrible and such a rubbish way of ruining other people’s happiness.

People don’t actually realise how much words can really hurt a person’s self esteem.

Here’s another experience I’ve had when we try and be there for someone and they are just completely toxic for you and they make you psychologically drained to the point you end up becoming someone we don’t recognise come on we have all been there with this one at some point in our life’s.

It’s not even about selfcare it’s about knowing when enough is enough.

Another example here girl meets boy..

Girl is very outgoing, nice, helpful, trustworthy, loving

Boy is egotistical, wants to be liked, has to be right and very much out for himself. But he does have a few good qualities honestly 😁

But girl doesn’t see him like that at the start everything is nice boy is exciting he’s talented he’s affectionate everything she wants him to be.

Untill the walls dropped and she sees the real him but she still loves him anyway.

The boy is an empty lonely shell with no emotional thought of the girl but boy will use her for what he needs her time her body and her love.

The girl starts to notice the boys negative attitude and looses herself trying to save him.

Then the girl completely looses herself she’s unbalanced unhappy and confused by this boys behaviour.

When the thinks enough is enough she realise not everything was her fault but she knows she’s to blame too.

Until one day there relationship and friendship is broken and the boy finds another girl to inflict his negative behaviour on her and then the cycle begins again.

Unfortunately this is known too well its another example of negative behaviour from human beings.

The point I’m getting to is that you can tell when someones vibe isn’t quite right it’s a funny little thing called intuition everyone has it take note on how someone makes you feel how they approach you.

Always trust your gut instinct is never rarely wrong.

Don’t let people drain your happiness life’s to short.

Love to you all

Stacie xx

What are we waiting for πŸ€”

Hey all..

I hope all my American readers and followers had a fabulous 4th of July.

Had a little celebration of my own on that day too it was my daughters 6th birthday that day and by god is she independent.

Well I haven’t blogged beacuse I’ve been trying to de stress and focus on myself for a while it’s kind of helped but I’ve also had busy times with end of school year events etc.

My health is pretty much still the same living a gluten free lifestyle is not a walk in the park me saying to myself you can’t have that but saying oh sod it have it and suffer later has been mostly the outcome.

To be completely gluten free you either one need to win the lottery or two rob a bank it’s really not acceptable to charge someone Β£3 for a packet of gluten free crackers then Β£0.90 for normal ones I thought if you taken an extra ingredient out it would be less but no that’s just stacie brain over thinking again.

Anyway enough about crackers… πŸ˜‚

During this, quite reflective time I’ve have been thinking a lot about how I always lived in the past and how I always thought I could make things right truth is you can’t turn back time as cher once said…

But you can learn a great deal from a situation and to be sure you don’t go down the same path again.

My anxiety peaked around midweek got a bit paranoid that people hated me not sure why this was but I’m pretty sure it’s because I had been thinking about the past.

Don’t get me wrong I’ve always tried to be honest and open with people one thing with me is you will never get bullshit from me it will always be πŸ’― the truth even if its not what you want to hear.

I’m a virgo your gonna get it either way weither you like it or not

So sorry….

I’ve been trying to understand why people are the way they are with me but I don’t think I will ever be able to understand.

Suppose it’s just human behaviour.

Well I have to say I experienced my first out door movie experience it was fabulous to be honest when you have had a bit of a strange week at work and at home unwinding and switching off is important.

That’s when it hits me I’m really lucky to be where I am and have my girls.

I’ve made a promise to myself that if the situation feels right to go for it and to not anyone or anyone get in my way.

Timing isn’t always perfect and it’s not always on our side.

So after being a strange and busy week my weekend hasn’t been that bad…

I’m also super happy that πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡πŸ‘‡ stranger things is back on and it’s series 3 baby.

If I’ve reached out to you lately know I always hold special peice of you in my heart if you haven’t responded and you read my blog know I will always thank you for the part you played in my life.

Love to you all

Stacie xxx

Cold heart but a deep soul

Evening all ❀️

I have Sunday night anxiety again πŸ™„

Just to top it off I’ve just saw the episode of opie’s wake in sons of anarchy im gutted I know it’s only a TV series but it’s story line has some real life lessons that hit home. About loyalty and doing whats right in life to help the ones you love.

Opie was a fantastic character he gave his life to protect the ones he loved.

Things like this really hit home to me and no I’m not going to run away and get a motorbike this is all about how far would people go for the ones they love.

How loyalty overcomes peoples need to be selfish.

It’s so easy to be wrapped up in your own little bubble to be emotionally switched off to people’s love and there willing to show you they genuinely care.

Is it really everyman and women to themselves Where’s the compassion in that?

To me when I genuinely have someone in my life and in my circle that I genuinely love and respect I would do anything for that person I would have there back no questions asked.

I do have a personality that can switch once hurt or betrayed it takes a lot to reach that point but when it does I don’t see how there is any going back.

And if I do I know in my heart it’s genuine love I have for that person is real.

I’m known to have a….

But honstly that’s just a wall I’ve built around my heart to stop the pain from showing on the outside.

Pain from being pushed away by people who I genuinely thought loved me and respected me turned Out to be another story.

But everyone I have in my life I genuinely care about and love with all my heart.

I would stop at nothing to help and show I care.

Even though I carry a heavy burden of my own I would always be there for them.

Trouble with me is I don’t trust easy and once I do its a long standing trust unless it’s broken.

My point here is don’t judge my loyalty never judge my choices I will only allow what i will allow and rest is up to fate..

Peace ✌️

Stacie xx